Re-Introduction to Stay-at-Home Motherhood
There was a time when the roles in a family were well defined. Dad went out and worked a job or business every day to support his family. Mom stayed home and made sure the house was in order, children were taken care of and every body was fed.
Today, it’s not as simple. Both parents often work, the kids are in many activities, and both parents share the roles of cooking and cleaning and all the other responsibilities that come with having a family.
But many women are ready to go back to the roles of former times. They crave being able to wake up with their kids and have quiet mornings with young ones, or not to have to worry about daycare when a child is home sick from school.
Or maybe Mom wants to homeschool the kids. Since COVID many families realized that homeschooling can be a great way of life for some families! But the financial implications are definitely something to consider.
The Financial Implications of Single Income Household
To go from a double income household to a single income household would definitely take some planning. If your lifestyle is based on two incomes, some things will have to change. Especially if you are living paycheck to paycheck, you will need to make some drastic changes.
Maybe you will need to downsize on your house, trips, vehicles and eating out. Maybe it means cutting out Starbucks, spa treatments and shopping trips. But what would it be worth to you to raise your own children with less money, but without the stress of a crazy busy life.
The value of being a stay-at-home mom goes far beyond the money. You will be the one raising your kids. You don’t need to worry if the day care or day home is understaffed or keeps up to date on all the safety protocols. AND you don’t need to worry about your kids constantly getting sick from other kids at the day care!
You get to be there for all your kids firsts, you get to choose the environment that your kids meet friends. And when your kids are school aged, you can be home if your kids need a day home from school, or you can homeschool and research different ways of learning for your child!
Assessing Your Financial Landscape
The first thing you need to do is conduct a thorough financial self-assessment.
Figure out how much money, after taxes, is coming in to your household every month. Then figure out your expenses, including debt and retirement savings. If you cannot afford to live on one income because of your debt, I would suggest selling things to pay off the debt.
I found that if you keep working so you can pay off debt so you can stay home….doesn’t work. You will be in the cycle forever because you will be tempted to keep up the lifestyle you have been living. It’s hard to change habits, and I find that often you need to shake it up in a big way.
If your mortgage or upkeep of your home is taking a lot of your money, maybe its time to downsize. If your car payments are the reason you can’t stay at home and live on one income, sell your car and buy a used one. Or, if you live in an area where walking is appropriate, maybe it’s time to go down to one vehicle!
Either way, identify and cut non-essential expenses. Keep the goal of being a stay at home mom at the center of your thinking. This will help when you compare it to what you may have to give up for this objective.
Sit down with your family and create a realistic budget that is tailored to one income. Instead of feeling restrictive, a good budget should be freeing, because you know what you are working with! And when you are forced to find free things to do, you will find there are a lot of free things to do and places to see with your kids!
Smart Money Management Techniques
Once your budget is set, keep educating yourself on personal finance and budgeting. I am not a numbers person, and I have found it easier to just keep learning about finances, because it keeps it fresh in my brain! And keep researching ways to save money…follow people on Social Media that have realistic ways to save money. You never know what tips will work for you!
When your kids are still at home, look for local programs at your library for kids or local mom groups. When my kids were younger there were programs like Rhymes that Bind, Stay and Play, Fit Moms (going for walks with stroller groups or doing weights with our kids playing in the center) and there was even a free skating hour 1 to 2 times a week at our local arena!
Keep in mind as well that there may be big tax benefits to going down to one income, depending on where you live. When your spouse can claim you as a dependent due to you not earning an income, this will lower the amount of income taxes your family will have to pay. Here in Canada, the lower your income is, the more you will receive in monthly Child Tax Benefit from the government.
Spend some time looking into government programs or other local programs that will also help you put your kids in sports. Sports is something that can really hit the budget hard, but there are options that can help!
Earning Income from Home: Real Possibilities
If you have done your budget, sold things to pay off debt, downsized, etc., but are still finding it tough to make ends meet, then maybe you want to explore ways to earn income from home. There are many legitimate work-from-home opportunities out there, it’s just finding the one that works for you!
Take an honest look at what you already do. What hobbies or skills do you have that could be turned into a profitable side business? What is something that is a need in your community that you could turn into a business from home?
There are things like photography, opening a day-home, baking, sewing, website design, flower bouquet making, painting…. The list can go on and on, because there are so many ways to make money from home! You just have to figure out what it is that will work for you.
Want to know what route I choose to earn money from home? Click this link to learn more!
Once you decide what it is you want to do to make money from home, it’s time to work on your schedule to manage your time effectively between work and parenting duties. Otherwise you will be right back at being too busy and stressed because your job, even though you are working from home, takes over your time!
There has to be that healthy balance of using your creativity and talents to earn a side income from home, while still making sure that your primary focus is your family….because that is why you wanted to stay home in the first place!
Minimizing Expenses without Sacrificing Quality of Life
I found when I was working outside the home when my kids were young, I would spend a lot more money. I was not good at meal planning, and so would get fast food, or run to the grocery store for some quick, easy food for supper.
However, when I stayed home with the kids, I had time to plan meals and take advantage of sales and bulk buying. I even remembered to use coupons once in a while!
I am not going to lie…I really don’t love cooking. But I have found that ground beef and pre cooked chicken are my best friends! We usually get beef through family or friends, and have the butcher put most of it into ground beef, besides some roasts and a few steaks. You will have to put out more money up front to get your meat this way, but in the long run, it is far cheaper than buying it at the store! We also try to source chickens locally, but if I can’t find any, I buy whole chickens on sale, cook them all, cut up the meat, and put it in the freezer for quick meals in the future.
Things like potatoes and rice and pasta are good for the budget, as well as canned or frozen veggies. I know fresh is best, but where I live in Canada, we have a short growing season, and vegetables are very expensive in the off season!
Even crafts or home projects, it always saves a ton of money to do it yourself. And if you are home already, you can get your kids involved and be teaching them at the same time!
Building Financial Security for the Long-Term
One thing to establish early on in this stay at home journey, is an emergency fund. An emergency fund is so important for things that are not regular expenses, but expenses that seem to pop out of nowhere at the most inopportune times.
Things like needing a new furnace, or washer and dryer, new tire for the vehicle, etc. These are all good things to budget for, but having an emergency fund to cover the cost is essential. Start an emergency fund with bottle return money, or bonuses from your husbands job, or even gifts from family. If you find yourself with a little extra once in a while, try to put it toward your emergency fun until that fund hits $1000.
Also, start planning for retirement! That is going to be harder on a single income, but maybe your husbands employer will match contributions to a retirement savings plan. Or maybe this is what your side income will be for… contributing to your own retirement plan to supplement what your spouse is already putting in.
Final Thoughts: Embracing the Stay-at-Home Journey
While embracing the stay-at-home journey, it is important to balance financial prudence with enjoying the present. You will find many ways to enjoy the present that do not actually cost a lot of money! Time is your most valuable asset so use it wisely.
There are often many community supports and other support systems that you can utilize, you just need to know about them! If you don’t know about them, you can’t utilize them. Speak to local community agencies or even your local library for information on these supports.
And if you need more encouragement, remember: the financial journey is part of personal growth! Make it your own personal challenge to succeed at the financial aspect of staying at home with your kids, and you will have double the reward – being able to stay home and raise your kids AND financial stability!